Dating a newly divorced man
Maybe my hymen was like a personal Great Wall of China.
But really, between his giant penis, his premature ejaculation problem and my tight-as-a-virgin-because-I-was-a-virgin problem, well, the whole thing was pretty much doomed. We had tried couples counseling and everything else: lingerie, candles, massage oil. I would have thought I was hopelessly frigid, except right around the time we started counseling, I started spending time with an old friend, Sam.
When I met my now ex-husband Mike, I had just turned 21.
We met at small Catholic liberal arts college, and even though I no longer believed in Jesus, the Saints, the Bible, God, really any of that, I was a virgin then and I was a virgin when we divorced.
I almost gave it up for him, and I let him put his hand down my pants, but I had to draw the line.But after our third date, he told me he wanted to wait until we were married. Plus, he was a supportive friend, so much kinder than anyone I'd ever known.He volunteered at homeless shelters and sang in the church choir.Apparently neither did he, because he simply started kissing me awkwardly as he positioned himself on top of me. He had not done anything seductive in the hours, let alone minutes, leading up to our big scene. Michael didn't seem upset, only slightly disappointed that things didn't turn out differently.We kept right on trying for weeks, for months, for years, and kept right on failing.
Though I wasn't that experienced, the other guys I'd been with usually got me so excited and lost in the moment that all that stood between me and his penis inside of me was that Virgin Mary pendant. I was always able to concentrate, think clearly and keep my cool. During our make-out sessions, I always felt like I was directing a blind actor on a cluttered stage. It seemed like if I hadn't climbed on top of him on our third date, nothing would have ever happened.